July 19, 2026

Indianola Presbyterian Church

"Not Meant to Be Alone"
Sermon by Rev. Trip Porch

July 19, 2026                                                                                                                                                Based on Ecclesiastes 4: 7-12

There's a well-trod story our culture loves to tell. You know it by heart. The self-made person. The lone genius.
The cowboy riding off into the sunset, alone, needing nobody.

We hand out awards for it. We write biographies about it. Pull yourself up by your own bootstraps, we say, as if that were physically possible. As if anyone, anywhere, could ever actually do that.

The writer of Ecclesiastes saw that story playing out twenty-five hundred years ago. The writer calls themself the Teacher, and they spend most of this strange little book wandering around observing human life and telling us what they see. And in chapter four, they see someone we all recognize. 

A person who has chosen their work over relationships.  A person who has chosen to isolate themselves. No companions. Working constantly. Never satisfied.
And the Teacher asks the questions that the person never stops to ask themselves: 

Why? Why am I working so hard? Who is all this for?

The Teacher has a word for this kind of life.
In Hebrew it's hevel.   Vapor. Fog. mist. The kind of thing you try to close your hand around and find nothing there.
The Teacher says, a life of endless work with no one to share it …is like trying to catch hold of a breath. It's a miserable situation.

And then, right in the middle of this book of the bible, which is famous for its gloominess, the Teacher gives us several lines that are incredibly warm. Verses about companionship.

“Two are better than one.” They say.

Two are better than one because when you fall down, somebody can help you up. Because on a cold night, two people can keep each other warm. Because when trouble comes looking for you, and it will come looking, two can stand against it together.

This is not greeting card sentimentality. This is survival wisdom.
This is somebody who has lived long enough to know that everyone falls. Everyone gets cold.
Everyone faces things too big to face alone.
The question is never whether you will fall. The question is whether anyone will be there to reach down a hand to you when you do.

And here's the thing I want the whole congregation to hear this morning, because while our service today is a wedding for a Jesse and Aaron, It is also just our regular Sunday. It's communal worship. It's us. And this text is for everyone, not just a couple about to join their life together.

Notice who the Teacher lists when describing the companions we need. The teacher never actually says spouse or partner. The teacher says companion.. It says child and sibling.  The Teacher casts a wide net.
The remedy for aloneness in this life is not necessarily marriage, or even romantic relationships. The remedy for aloneness is companionship, and companionship comes to us in a hundred forms. 

A friend who calls every day. A daughter who knows all your stories. A choir that saves your seat. A church community that notices when you're missing.

Some of the deepest companionships in this room are not romantic at all.
Jesse and her daughter Sophia talk every single day. They have walked through life’s ups and downs, side by side, mother and daughter, and anyone who has seen them together knows what the Teacher was talking about. When one falls, the other is there to helps her up.

And Aaron first knew that kind of companionship with his mom, Wanda. They were more than mother and son. They were best friends. He could tell her anything without fear of judgment. They’d play together and prank each other. They laughed together in that way you only laugh with someone who has known you your whole life. Her absence today is real, and we name it. But so is her presence. The love she gave Aaron is part of what he brings into this marriage. Companionship like that doesn't end. It gets woven in.

Which brings us to the teacher’s main image to teach this idea… a rope.

The Teacher ends with a proverb: a rope made of three strands is not quickly broken. One strand on its own will snap. Two strands hold better. But when you braid a third strand through, something changes. The rope becomes stronger than the sum of its parts. Each strand bears the others up.

People have long read this passage at weddings and imagined that third strand woven into a relationship as God, and I think that's right. When God is woven through a relationship, it can hold weight that would snap it otherwise. 

But I don't think we have to choose just one meaning. The third strand is God. But the third strand is also community. It's Sophia. It's Mylie and Austin. It's the memory of Wanda. 

It's this congregation, these people who will keep showing up for Jesse and Aaron long after the cake is gone. No marriage survives on two strands alone. It isn't supposed to.

Jesse and Aaron, can I tell the congregation something about you? When you two met, neither of you were looking for a relationship. You had both made a kind of peace with being on your own. You were content. 

And I want to honor that, because contentment in solitude is not nothing. It's hard won.

 But then, without planning it, without a strategy, you made a connection. And the connection would not let go.

You've both been married before. You know that a wedding is not magic. You know that these rings are nothing more than symbols. Which means you are standing up here today with your eyes wide open. You're not marrying a perfected idea of each other.
You're marrying each other, the real people, the ones you've already seen fall and already helped up. You chose this because you love each other, because you can imagine growing old together, and because life is simply better in each other's company.

I love what you told me about quiet in your relationship. That some of your favorite time together is just sitting in the same room, saying nothing. That is not a small thing. Anybody can enjoy someone's company at a party. It takes real companionship to enjoy someone's silence.

The Teacher in Ecclesiastes would understand. Two lying down together to keep warm is not some strange dramatic image. It's an ordinary one.
It's Tuesday night. It's the long haul. It's the daily, unglamorous, faithful work of being with someone.

So here is my charge to you, and honestly, it's my charge to everyone in this room.

When you fall, and you will, let someone help you up.
Don't do the proud thing. Don't do the lonely thing. Reach for other hands to help you up.

When someone near you falls, be the hand. Come to each other's defense. Keep each other warm.

And keep braiding in the third strand. Pray together. Reach for God’s hand. Stay woven into this community. 

Let God and God's people hold you when your own strength runs out, because it will run out. That's not failure. That's being human. 

We were never meant to carry this life alone.

The Teacher looked at a person with everything and no one, and called it fog. A miserable chasing after something you cannot hold. 

But he looked at two people helping each other up, and he called it good. Better than wealth. Better than all that work. The model that we should all strive to have in our own life in community.

Jesse and Aaron, today you become companions for the rest of the journey. And church, today we promise to be a strand woven around them.

Two are better than one.

Three strands are not quickly broken.
Thanks be to God. Amen.

WE GATHER IN AWE AND PRAISE

PRELUDE                                             “Blest Be the Tie that Binds”               arr. Christopher Alexander

INTROIT                             “A Call to Silence”                                     Craig Courtney

Brayden Williams, Student Conductor

WELCOME                                                                    Rev. Trip Porch

One: This is the day that the Lord has made

All: Let us rejoice and be glad in it.

*CALL TO WORSHIP

     One: God did not create us one by one and leave it there.

Many: God set us in families, in friendships, in neighborhoods, in churches.

One: From the very beginning, God looked at a person alone and said, "This is not good."

Many: So God gives us to each other.

One: So come, let us worship God together.

*Hymn 685                             “Unseen God Your Hand Has Guided”                                                 MERTON

*PRAYER OF CONFESSION                                                          Michael Ayers

God of covenant and community, you made us for each other, but we confess how often we choose to go it alone. We treat needing help from others as weakness. We hide our struggles behind closed doors and polite answers. We tell ourselves we are being strong and independent when really we are just being distant. And we confess the other side too: the times we saw someone struggling and looked away, the calls we never returned, the neighbors we never learned to name. Forgive us, God. Unclench our independence. Open our hands to receive help and to offer it. Bind us again to you and to one another, that we might live the life you made us for. Amen.

*ASSURANCE OF PARDON

*RESPONSE OF PARDON 582 “Glory to God, Whose Goodness Shines on Me” GLORY TO GOD

*PASSING OF THE PEACE

One: The peace of Christ be with you!

     All:      And also with you.

WE LISTEN FOR GOD’S WORD

ANTHEM                                              “Look at the World”                                                         John Rutter

CHILDREN’S MESSAGE                                                                      Trip Porch

PRAYER FOR ILLUMINATION

SCRIPTUREEcclesiastes 4:7-12 CEB & The Voice

Next, I saw something that was pointless:  There are people who are utterly alone, with no companions, no children or even a sibling. Yet they work hard their entire life and are still never satisfied with the wealth they gain. Do they ever stop to ask, “Why am I working so hard?” or “Why am I depriving myself of life’s simple pleasures?”
This, too, is fleeting, like trying to catch hold of a breath; it’s a miserable situation.

Two are better than one because they have a good return for their hard work.  If either should fall, one can pick up the other. But how miserable are those who fall and don’t have companions to help them up!  In the same way, if two lie down together, they can keep each other warm. But how will the one who sleeps alone stay warm against the night? And if one person is vulnerable to attack, two can drive the attacker away. As the saying goes, “A rope made of three strands is not quickly broken.”

One: Holy wisdom, Holy Word,

All: Thanks be to God

SERMON                                                                               Rev. Trip Porch

WE RESPOND TO GOD’S WORD

SPECIAL MUSIC “I See the Light”

Sophia Haws and David Scott

MARRIAGE OF JESSE HAWS & AARON COUNTS

PROCESSION

*HYMN  611                                       “Joyful, Joyful”                                                          HYMN TO JOY

CHARGE & BENEDICTION

POSTLUDE                                “Joyful, Joyful”                                arr. Christina HarmonJ. Funk             

Acknowledgments: Unless otherwise indicated, all texts and music are printed and broadcast under OneLicense.net license #A-702452